Angry Ninja. angry ninja t shirts, store, blog, adventures and more

the 8 phases of relationships

i loled all day when i saw this. hopefully this will start your weekend off right.

source: www.divisibleby0.com

subtlety is not my forte

angry ninja has never been the most subtle with his intentions while in the “dating” phase of a relationship. in fact, while in a relationship, the following conversation usually occurs:

me: why did you decide to go out with me?
lady: well, i knew you liked me.
me: whaaaaa?! how did you know that?
lady: well you wouldnt stop asking for my number, and then you wouldnt stop calling me, and then you added me on facebook, and wanted to hang out all the time…
me: so how did you know that i liked you?
lady: ….

so there you have it. i dont beat around the bush when it comes to my intentions with a lady. you shouldnt either. thats what this chinese food doggie bag take out box t shirt is all about.

if she doenst know you want to go out and eat some chinese food with her when she sees this shirt, you really have to step up your game there buddy.

side note on the zazzle store. some of you may not know this, but i leave all of my shirts fully customizable on the store. this means that you can take one of my designs, put it on a mens/womens/kids shirt dark or light, and change all of the text. you can even choose the shirt material, 100% cotton, vintage shirt, heavy duty, etc. the shirts that i have predesigned on the webstore are just a simple guide to what the shirts could look like.

someone is up to his old tricks again…

i used to have this roomate back at cal. he would get injured all the time, to the point where i thought he was either really clumsy or doing it on purpose. little did i know, it might have been a little bit of both.

you see, when you get hurt, the student health center gives you crutches, and heres a little secret guys - ladies dig the crutches. i mean, i dont know if its their maternal instincts kicking in, but the first thing they say when seeing him would be:

aww. how did you hurt yourself?

to which he would respond with one of the follwoing:

a) running across the street to save a puppy
b) wrestling a bear
c) my jerk roomate mike (points to me) hit me with a baseball bat

in reality, he probably hurt himself doing something stupid like knocking over a light into his own head at a party or stumbling off the front porch.

anyways, it looks like hes up to his old tricks again, as once again, hes injured. broken ninja - gets the ladies. he better not try to pull anything because his girlfriend would probably kill him. shes fierce.

side note on the zazzle store. some of you may not know this, but i leave all of my shirts fully customizable on the store. this means that you can take one of my designs, put it on a mens/womens/kids shirt dark or light, and change all of the text. you can even choose the shirt material, 100% cotton, vintage shirt, heavy duty, etc. the shirts that i have predesigned on the webstore are just a simple guide to what the shirts could look like.

lessons learned from the ladies aka ladies need shirts too

here is a typical conversation with a female angry ninja reader:

female reader: i really like your t shirts. i think they are really cute.
me: why thank you. id prefer bad-ass but ill take cute.
female reader: whatever. why dont you have any designs for girls?
me: um, because i dont wear girl t shirts…
female reader: the world isnt all about you! i want you to make girl t shirts! (stomps her feet)
me: okay.

okay so thats not 100% accurate. whatever though. the lessons of the conversation are that:

• ladies want me to design lady t shirts.
• the world does not revolve around me (it must revolve around them).

and there you have it. when angry ninja is locked up, the lady ninjette holds the key… to everything.

to answer yesterdays questions:

why has the angry ninja been locked up?
he probably did something that angered the lady ninjette.

whatever can this mean?
he will not be able to partake in boys night out this week.

what has he done to deserve this?
he probably forgot to do the dishes or take out the trash.

disclaimer: this is in no way indicative of my relationship with the lady. im free as a bird and make my own rules… when shes out of town.

side note on the zazzle store. some of you may not know this, but i leave all of my shirts fully customizable on the store. this means that you can take one of my designs, put it on a mens/womens/kids shirt dark or light, and change all of the text. you can even choose the shirt material, 100% cotton, vintage shirt, heavy duty, etc. the shirts that i have predesigned on the webstore are just a simple guide to what the shirts could look like.

angry ninja - locked up and in big trouble

oh noes! why has the angry ninja been locked up? whatever can this mean? what has he done to deserve this?! tune in tomorrow to find out!

angry ninja: is locked up.