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ride the express

youre going to want to ride the express. trust me. funniest movie ive seen in a while. how can it not be with lines like this:

this is like if that blue oyster sh*t met that african kush I had –and they had a baby. and then meanwhile, that crazy northern light stuff i had and the super red espresso snowflake met and had a baby. and by some miracle, those two babies met, and f*cked–this would the sh*t that they birthed. its almost a shame to smoke it. its like killing a unicorn…with, like, a bomb.

it also has one awesome soundtrack. i could listen to this mia song - paper planes all day. well, at least twice in a row on my iphone

also, time for another music t shirt. headphones are good for music.

how can you not want to watch this movie now?

step brothers is going to be awesome beyond belief. will ferrell, john c reilly, judd apatow. if only ben stiller were somehow included as well.

if the deleted scenes are this funny, the ones that actually made it into the film must be awesometacular!

its a snake in a box

some of you wonder where the inspiration behind my metal gear solid box t shirt comes from.

you: i dont get your metal gear solid box t shirt.
me: its kind of a inside joke, the main character hides in a box to avoid being seen.
you: … i dont believe… you…

well fellow angry ninja reader, you better believe. and not only are there people like me making t shirts about that video game, there are people making origami arts and crafts. below you will find the one that i put together.

papercraft source

this weekend, i plan on finishing up metal gear solid 4. it actually makes me kind of sad, knowing that this will be my last adventure as solid snake. i think im pretty close to the end and ive been putting off completing it during the weekdays because i want to really take the time to soak in the story line. it really is something else.

i also plan on catching wanted. looks pretty freaking awesome. the movie kind of reminds me of assassins creed - a fraternity of assassins, kill one to save a thousand, etc. hit me up if you dont have anything to do sunday night and want to watch. my eyes will be glued to james mcavoy. i mean angelina jolie.

wait what?

real life indiana jones boulder… almost

da duh da daaaaaaa. da duh duuuuuuhhhhhhh. da duh da daaaaaaa. duh duh duh daaa duuuuuuhhhhhhh. if you dont know what i just typed, click below:

good luck getting that out of your head the rest for the rest of the day.

im really looking forward to indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull. the indiana jones franchise was one of the few movies that i remember watching with my parents back in the day, and thats a pretty big feat (the plot was easy enough to understand so no subtitles were needed).

i even remember having the three movies on vhs. thats also a pretty big deal, since my parents almost never buy english language movies unless they really enjoy them. in fact, thinking back, i think we only have four: the indiana jones trilogy, the die hard trilogy, forrest gump, and my fair lady.

as much as im looking forward to the movie, im probably not looking forward to it as much as these superfans. i mean, they made a boulder out of a million legos. i dont think my group of friends and i have a million legos to build a fake boulder to roll down the hills of san francisco. i kind of wish we did now though.

being sick = gatorade and lots of movies

as some of you know, i was struck with some sort of crazy sickness on friday/this weekend. i had a fever, couldnt eat, couldnt sleep, couldnt leave the house for more than 30 min at a time (had to say near the bathroom). what caused it? might have been the heat. might have been the ebola virus.

there isnt much to do when youre bed/couchridden. i coudlnt even bring myself to play assassins creed on the ps3. that would have involved thinking, paying attention and intricate button mashing - way more effort than i could muster at that state. instead, i drank a lot of gatorade and watched a buttload of movies. heres the rundown, along with my reviews.

note: the more angry ninjas a review gets, the more awesome the movie, because angry ninjas are awesome. this isnt some sort of reverse rating system where the more angry the movie makes me, the more angry ninjas it receives. now that weve got that settled…

27 dresses

watched this with the lady. its a mix between how to lose a guy in 10 days and (insert chick flick here). it had its funny moments (any scene with judy greer is pretty funny). the plot is predictable, but if your lady friend really wants to watch this movie, its not unbearable.

rating: 3/5 angry ninjas

king of kong - a fistful of quarters

if youre interested in classic video games like donkey kong, galaga, centipede, etc, this is worth a watch. its a documentary about a guy who sets off to be the world champion in donkey kong. hes an average schmoe, who is pitted against the sleazy current world champion. when i say sleazy, i mean it. funny to see how politics are in play everywhere, even in video game championships.

rating: 4/5 angry ninjas

the assassination of jesse james by the coward robert ford

holy crap give me those 2.5 hours of my life back. i saw the ratings on rotten tomatoes and thought this would be worth putting on my blockbuster queue. boy was i wrong. this movie contained no pacing, was mind numbingly boring (i think i fell asleep for like 10 minutes), and i am getting frustrated/mad just writing this paragraph. maybe it was because i watched it while i was sick, but man, i thought this movie sucked big time.

rating: 1/5 angry ninjas

cloverfield

awesome awesome awesome. i popped this dvd in not expecting much, given the lukewarm reviews and word of mouth bashery it received. well i for one, was very entertained. loved the unique storytelling, flashbacks, and the subtle video game references (the entire movie is shot via the perspective of a handheld camera, by a guy named hud = heads up display = how information such as life/ammo is displayed to the gamer on screen for you non-gamers).

warning: watching this on too big of a tv screen might make you queasy. not as queasy as blair witch though.

rating: 5/5 angry ninjas

ps. just as a measuring stick, i am known to have impeccable taste in movies, having loved such classics as dude, wheres my car, and the big hit.